Wisdom of the Ages

I now know the answer to my life: I have been a very bad girl and this is Hell!! Laughing about the absurdity of life makes everything easier…also, a great faith in God!

Marilyn in SC

I think every day of our life we grow by learning things from myriad sources and we should keep our minds and hearts open to such learning

Sita

Be Here Now. The reader, like me, may have heard this often, but I really, really heard it when I finally knew I had to refrain from ever feeling the victim and hanging onto the past.

Lora from Canada

I thought about what gem of wisdom has changed me.
It has to be:
The toes you tread on today are on the feet which are on the ends of the legs that hold up the bottom you may have to kiss tomorrow.
I still tread on toes but sometimes I think about things first.

Peta

Very succinctly:

Shit happens.
This, too, shall pass.

Unfortunately, I’m presently facing a situation (chronic debilitating disease, non-fatal) that will only get worse, which makes me wonder about #2 – but on the other hand, I’ve learned that people are actually better than I had thought. Confinement to a wheelchair gives a whole new perspective!

Left as a comment by Lynne Gabbe-Harkcom

I know this is from a well known song but is something I try and live by:
“I am what I am, and what I am needs no excuses” It’s taken me all my life to start learning that this is the one thing I have heard I need to listen to.
And when someone tells me they love me, its really is worth taking the risk to believe them.
Female, 26, York, UK.”

At my school when we said we needed something they used to ask us to categorize it as Needs, Wants or Wishes. We were unlikely to get Wishes.

from Joyce of J’s Quilting Blog

from Susan of Susan in stitches
two axioms I live by:
Always look ahead … there are no regrets in that direction
and
the only difference between a stepping stone and a stumbling block is in how you use them.

[this last one came my way not long after my second son was diagnosed as severely disabled. That was about 25 years ago . I’m still here. Still relatively sane. Musta helped huh?]

Something my grandmother lived by, which kept her life
and her home uncluttered…

things you want,
things you need,
and things you can’t live without.

From Robin with thanks

Linda Hartmann dropped me an email to add her observations after a career as psychotherapist

The only reason that people go to therapists (we’re talking about ordinary, you – and – me people here) is that it is the first time in their life that someone has listened to them — really listened to
them — for an hour. It is extremely addictive. I have had to kick many clients out after teaching them how to make friends.

The trick to happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have.

Something I try to live by daily.

Left by Joan in a comment

“Try to do everything you have to do with love and giving your best!”
from Corina

I have just completed transfering all the contributions to this project to this new blog. Previously they had been housed as a category of my other blog inaminuteago. I decided the project needed a blog of its own as it makes sense to people if it is self contained.

The Wisdom of the ages project started life off as a straight web page. As time went on and the technology changed I decided to transfer the contributions a blog as the software meant it was easier to maintain. Now it has a home of its own.

“Wisdom of the Ages” asks people to share the answer to a simple (but not so simple) question. What lesson have you learnt in life? Just as the stitch collection shares knowledge that was handed on orally, lessons learnt from others in the past were also handed down the generations in the form of little sayings, expressions, anecdotes and peoples stories. I am trying to hint at this with the “Wisdom of the Ages” project. With this project I hope create a snap shot of common sense or popular wisdom.

HOW YOU CAN JOIN IN …

Leave a comment or send me an email answering the question and it will be published online.

Please note that comments are moderated in order to help combat spam. This means that your comment will be published once I have approved it.

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Yvette of White Threads Wonders it reads:

You don’t have to do everything NOW

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Peggy of Angelthreads Musings it reads:

If it was perfect, it could have been made in a factory

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from nuvofelt
it reads:

Never fall out with anyone – you never know who you may need.

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Patsy in Ottawa, Canada it reads:

People will remember little of what you say, less of how you look, but they will never forget how you made them feel. Be in the moment. We have two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we speak.

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Melisa Bakos it reads:

While watching Touched by an Angel I found this good point:There are two kinds of pride.
1.)Too proud to do a terrible job
2.)Proud enough to do a great job of it no matter how terrible the job is.

I received a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Gwenda it reads:

I believe in “what you say is what you get” also told to me by my grandmother “is the price you put on your head is the price you are paid” How true

I received a thoughtful contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project from Linda Hartmann. It reads:

What I’ve learned to date: very little actually — it used to be only
ONE thing I absolutely KNEW FOR SURE and that was: It is extremely
important how you treat other people.

I have recently added one more “for sure” to the first-and-only-thing I knew for sure and that is: Everyone sees the world differently — through their own filters (sort of like photography) which include where they were raised, whether they are male or female, what their family or significant others believed and therefore acted and treated them in a specific manner, what they were told about the world before they could experience it on their own, and a multitude of other facets that create those filters through which they look at the world. (Seeing the world through ‘rose-colored’ glasses is a descriptive and simplistic but accurate way of putting this.) There is at least one-thousand miles between the ages of 18 and 23 and that is when most of us learn this sometimes depressing information — that there is very little black and white —- only a great many shades of gray. (another reason it is dangerous for an 18-year-old to marry someone over the age of 23-24………..this 18-year-old may be a completely different person by the time they are 23-24…….scary sometimes and sometimes a happy result.)

So–I know only two things for sure as TRUTH in the context of what have I learned. I, of course, as most people I know have many, many opinions and beliefs. I had the privilege to teach college for approximately 15-18 years and one of the first things I tried to teach my classes was the difference between “facts” and “beliefs.” What A Job!!!!!

Folks don’t argue and fight over FACTS. They just are–the sun is up; we breath air; the wind is blowing today; etc. But–do we ever get into arguments, fights and wars over beliefs. My god is better than your god. My daddy can beat up your daddy. Your mama keeps a dirty house. I have chosen a much better career than you have. Money is the most important thing in a job…….in my life……..money is how we keep score………oh my…………..

Perhaps I could/should add one more to the list of “For Sure’s” —– it would be that BELIEFS create friends and enemies — sometimes to the extreme behavior of not understanding one another, certainly not listening to and not “hearing” that other, and maybe needing to kill the other.

Colleen Rangel left a contribution to Wisdom of the Ages project it reads:

I realized my mom was right when she told me that when you marry the man, you also marry his family. After 25 years of marriage, I have learned to listen to my mom.

Linda left a contribution to Wisdom of the Ages project it reads:

I’ve learned to “Trust in the Lord with all my heart” and to “Lean not on my own understanding. In all” my “ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct” my “paths.” This seems so simple and it truly is. This is my life lesson.

The idea of this project is to share something you have learned in life. All contributions are archived in a separate category in this blog which means you can browse them here. If you want to contribute simply leave a comment or email me and it will go online within a day or so.

From Rene Orgeron:

I have found that the dreams we wish for, the daydreams about our “wants” should often remain just that, if they become reality, they are not what we thought they would be, so the old adage “Be careful what you wish for” can be true, also along the same lines, I now watch the words that come out of me, for they can pollute others as well as oneself, speak carefully, we are what we say..

Christine Kilian of Johannesburg, South Africa emailed a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

Alcoholics Anonymous have a list of things to do JUST FOR TODAY. I have listed a few of these, which I have learned are very valuable, regardless of your circumstances:

Just for today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do some things for twelve hours that would appal me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.
Just for today, I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
Just for today, I will exercise my soul in three ways: (1) I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. (2) I will do at least two things I don’t want to do – just for exercise. (3) I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.
Just for today, I will have a quiet half hour all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.
Just for today, I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

Stephanie Nowlin left a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

I have been a RN for almost thirty years and this is Stephanie’s Elegant Nursing Theory:
“Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, ANY deviation is bad.”
This covers Airway, Breathing, and Circulation – Just the basics.

Anne Wallace left a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

In a casual conversation a friend of mine remarked, “If ya ain’t in a groove, ya in a rut.” Boy, did that hit home for me!

A contribution from Su reads:

I’ve found that letting go once in a while actually helps you keep your grip on things.

Letting go of something that seems such an important part of your life (in my case, my previous career) is difficult but if you take the first step a whole new world of adventure and surprises opens up. Take the first step.

Contributed by Sandy Vass

Andrea left a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

(Some of) what I have learnt in life:

Time is a strange and elusive thing, where sometimes a second can take hours to pass, and at other times an hour can whizz by in a second. Nobody really even knows for sure what time actually IS (let alone if we will ever be able to travel in any other direction or at any other speed than forward at the same speed we do now).

Time seems to be one of the important things in life for most people – and for me there never seems to be enough of it!
I always plan to do things then never seem to get there because I ran out of time, I leave things until “later” and then “later” never happens, and a lot of things always seem to take way longer than I ever thought they would.

But I am not sure the lesson should be to “do it now” and “don’t procrastinate” – because I have been told those lessons years ago and still don’t seem to pay any heed to them … maybe the lesson is that one should accept the fact that time is a fluid thing, and that we should enjoy each moment (no matter how short or long it seems) and make allowances for the fact that time seems to shrink or stretch at the most inconvenient of times – and not get too upset if we find ourself in a situation where we either have too much or too little time on our hands …hmmm … that seems to be another way of saying “life is what you make of it” … LOL

Actually that is not all I have learnt in life, or even the most important thing … I am not sure if there even IS a most important thing out of all the stuff I have learnt in life, and in my life I have learnt a LOT of stuff! (some useful, some not … although the definition of what is useful or useless might change as time goes on ) – life is one of those strange experiences where you keep on learning – I don’t think I (or most people for that matter) ever will stop learning things … maybe the day I stop learning is the day I stop living? or the day there is no point continuing to live … except that I wouldn’t want to die yet, in case it is just a setback and I start learning/living again

Linda a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

Never ascribe to malice and forethought what can be explained by ignorance and stupidity

A contribution by Vivian Garforth of Anlaby house, it reads:

I was sitting on a bus with an old (80+) lady when a young driver shot out of a side street nearly colliding with us. She commented that “It is better to be 30 minutes too late in this world than 30 years too early in the next!” I’ve never forgotten her advice.

Bettsi McComb of Tender arts contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

My favorite bit of wisdom comes from another woman (of course), but one who I know nothing about. Here it is:
The gloom of this world is but a shadow; behind it, yet within our reach, is joy. Take joy.
-Fra Giovanni 1513

This simple little quote reminds me that my attitude is always a choice. I think I especially like it because of how long ago it was first said. Life was infinitely harder 500 years ago and yet this woman had such a beautiful outlook. Inspiring wisdom, indeed!

We have all heard “Practice make Perfect” …at best, an illusive proposition.
More true and to the point is the idea that “Practice make Permanent”.
I have learned to be mindful of the things I practice (the things I do repeatedly).
Repetition solidifies and automates my life activity, be it the good habit or the bad!

Contributed by Wordicle

Maintain attitutes of youth – interest, optimism, enthusiasm. Find something that provides a challenge for the future, instead of memories of the past – whatever keeps you busy, active and in the mainstream of life.

People are more influenced by how much you care than how much you know.

There’s nothing like change to bring out emotion, and nothing like emotion to bring about change.

What we pay attention to reverbarates in our lives.

Courtesy is one of the highest virtues in times of stress.

On happiness my favourites are from Anne Frank “Whoever is happy will make others happy too”, and Ingrid Bergman “happiness is good health and a bad memory”

I love the quirkiness of this one “Unless you’re the lead dog, the scenery never changes”

contributed by
Female, 52, Adelaide South Australia.

A contributuion to the Wisdom of the Ages project arrived this morning from Flora Goodson, it reads:

My life lesson is one I re-learn every so often especially when working with the public, my husband or my kids & their various friends.

“never teach a pig to sing it waists your time & annoys the pig”

people are who they are & you need to work with them or around them the way they are.
trying to change someone is the height of folly & never works to your benefit.
Of course this is not to say I haven’t tried to teach a pig or two anyway!

and something my late father told me before he passed away
“don’t sweat the small stuff ”

My email delivered a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

One very important thing I’ve learned is to be very careful what you wish for…you may get it.

Another response by Ani Catt in the UK . It is actually stitching wisdom too it reads:

Frog stitch is the one which says *rippit rippit* and the time it takes to frog stitches OUT is indirectly proportionate to the time it took to get them IN …

Irene some excellent advice was left as part of the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

1) Your keys and your wallet are the two most important things you own. Don’t loose them.
2) Drink lots of water, get lots of sleep.
3) Never leave printing to the last minute.

An email arrived in my in box as a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

One thing I have learned is to never say “never”. As in “I will never do thus & such”. Also, worry is a waste of time and energy.

It has been contributed by Betts.

Janet in Colorado also left a contribution for Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

I can do most anything for an hour. As long as I know there’s a time limit, I seem to be able to step up and do disagreeable things cheerfully…for an hour or so. A close second would be that problems that look insurmountable at 3 a.m. are going to look much more managable at 7 a.m.

Another email contribution for Wisdom of the Ages project arrived from Luthorienne, it reads:

I’ve learned that my wealth must be measured by the things I have for which I would not take money. I’ve learned that, if I can get to the end of my life and have put more into the world than I have taken out of it, I will have been a success. I’ve learned that doing a kindness for another person enriches my life more than any material gain possibly could. And I’ve learned that God could have made us perfect, but didn’t, and that He only expects us to do our best.

Lela Popp a stitcher from Minnesota emailed me with a contribution for Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

What I have learned about life: Every life will have its setbacks. When they happen it is important to remember that:
No one can go back to create a new beginning, BUT everyone can go forward to create a new ending!

From Glenys Wild for the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

“No one can make you feel inferior without your permission” (Eleanor Roosevelt).

From Linda S for the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

“Never spend time around people who make you feel bad about yourself.” Life is made up of the choices we make and one of those choices is how to make the most of our happy times.

I have just had an email from Emmy Schoonbeek a Dutch crazy quilter with a contribution to Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

My Mother had always things to say but one thing I always remember

Don’t get annoyed
Be surprised

Linda at Chloe’s place a comment on the Wisdom of the Ages project, simply put it reads:

“Life is not a dress rehersal!”

Beche-la-mer of Two Cents left a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

Now that my 40th birthday is just around the corner, I am starting to wonder whether I will be grown up by the time it arrives. Though I usually feel grown up, I am sure I will look back at my 40-year-old self in a few years time and realise how immature I was(am).

Elizabeth Rosenberg has just left a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project, it reads:

No matter how carefully you plan for a “perfect” life, you’ll end up living the life that “happens” to you. So, don’t waste too much time planning. Instead, keep yourself ready to enjoy whatever happens.

Susan Sorrell of the personality loaded blog Creative Chick sent me a contribution to the Wisdom of the Ages project. I really like this one and a copy is going on my workroom wall.

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, gin & tonic in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO HOO what a ride!”

The greatest lesson I’ve learnt in life is that LIFE GETS MESSY – and we get to keep living it till we die. We want to keep it neat and clean and orderly, but we can’t always do that. There are just too many “balls” for us to juggle effectively in life, and when we (or someone close to us) drop(s) one or two, the best way to cope with the mess is not to get frustrated, but just to pick up and go on from there. We always get a chance to start over from where we are — that’s a beautiful truth about life. I think that’s one of the big reasons why we’re here: to learn how to solve problems gracefully. To me, quilting is a metaphor for life — you make your plans, but they don’t work out here or there, so you have to recalculate and adapt. And no matter what happens, things do work out in the end. One of my favorite sayings is: “Everything is always ok in the end. If it’s not, then it’s not the end.” Life is about hoping and persevering through the messes.

Contributed by Annie Fischer